Thursday 31 March 2011

This was the COACH TRIP from hell!

I had a fabulous idea. I talked my colleagues into it.

O my word, could a road BE any more winding if it tried? NO! Could the coach driver  have picked a MORE direct route with STRAIGHT bits of road? YES! YES! YES he could, I know - I have been on them.

It has been an awesome day! Hot coach, over excited children - all 65 of them. Hot coach and 5 teachers all stressed to max before we set off!!! Because we had SEVERAL children arrive late and even though they were threatened with the fact the coach would be leaving no matter what on time, we knew ( they knew) we wouldn't!
Off we went to Bradford's impressive museum of Media. it was MY idea we take the children, so on my head be it!! The exhibitions are awesome, hands on, informative and brlliant. You get to gawp at the poor DJs working at BBC Radio Bradford live on air.
Think we scared them away - honest they WERE there before I remembered to start taking photos!
TV Heaven.
That's what one of the areas is called! You get to look in a whole heap of  books listing different TV programmes and pick on and book it for private viewing! We chose Playschool. Ah Humpty, Jemima, Big Ted, Little Ted and Hambel. Ahhh.
The reason being is our children were working on a project about which decade was it best to be 5 -  10 years old. So we showed them some children's TV for comaprison. The children sat transfixed for 24 minutes. ( The length of the programme)
There are lots of different galleries all with knobs to twist, pull, turn. Gadgets to look at, listen to, touch and try out. Best of all, this museum is FREE.
"Hey, you are upside down!"
The children filmed themselves with real TV cameras in a REAL studio in a sitcom, reading the news with a proper autocue. They sat for Victorian photographs. " Hey ! you are upside down!" was the cry from EVERY single child from under the curtain!

O I have to go - Bingo ( Bloody school PTA fundraiser) Back to finish this post later ....

 BACK - Bingo was a success! I won a full house - Easter Egg then a HUGE box biscuits in the raffle. I know, I know, not good for OPTW. However, I gave them away :)

Back to the trip.
Mostly the trip back consisted of
a) children talking about feeling sick
b) children feeling sick
c) children nearly being sick
d) children being sick and not giving us any notice
di)children saying I'm going to be s blleeeurgh
dii)children saying I am going to be sick and then having the good manners and decency until we thrust a bucket under their noses, to be sick
e) staff running up and down the coach sideways like mad crabs screeching paper towels paper towels bags papertowels buckets be quiet, he's not been sick, no you will not be sick as well, you are fine, sit down, stop talking about it, no it doesn't smell, ( it did) :-/  no you can't smell sick ( they could) ;-/ etc etc
f) moving children further up the bus according to the shade of greeness.
g) telling children that it wouldn't be much longer ( It would - we had miles to go)
h) telling child in seat behind about how many miles there were.
i) At a tiny little village we had to pull up in order to let two sick covered children off the bus to a chorus of eeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww so we could mop them up as best we could - staff member raced to village shop to replenish carrier bags and tissues.
j) 7 sickly children got off the bus for fresh air - 58 other children getting very restless.
k) bus driver confirms basically the bus heating system is buggered. He admitted that he'd had to fill the water cooling system with water already and it was empty - meanwhile he had no way of shutting off  the blast furnace temperature heaters and no due to health and safety he could not drive with the door open. No dear reader, a child ( seatbelted in) might fall through the open door.  I wonder what H&S would have said to the fact that we were fiercly roasting said child alive and probably would suffer the bus exploding?
l) child feeling sick chinese whispers down the bus
m) staff on point of falling over that precipice telling children to be quiet, close their eyes, and breathe through their mouths and be still and they would be alright and absolutely NO MORE S WORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
n) arrive somewhat subddued at school. ( subddued - brains cooking slowly in own juices)

Actually - the above is a shortened version!!! Here are some photos to take your minds off the vomit.
What did FAB stand for?




Just off to get more cheese


One wonders are any of these HD ready?


If you can go. DO! ( On the motorway and preferably not with 65 children!)


  1. Stop the bus I want a wee wee, stop the bus I want a ... sorry could resist, oh you have such pleasant days out me dear ;-)

  2. Ha ha ha John! The children are just shy of THAT age! So no stop the bus I want a weeee wee, OR Charlie had a pigeon ( snigger) . Instead it was There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo wa s his name O ...about 15,675 times!


    He even mucks around with things that don't go bleat!

    What a horrible trip back to school. I am so glad I was not there for that part. I think maybe next time you should take your own car! lol But I'm glad the actual museum was fun, it sounds like a great time & I'm jealous.

    But if I have to be covered in vomit, I'll pass.


    One time, when I was particularly inspired, I had the kids singing Bingo, and then I started changing the dog to random animals with progressively longer names.

    I think I topped out at the pig named Penelope & bat named Bartholomew.

    And nobody vomited.

  4. I have tried to sing your version, Just now Eryn, out loud, much to the amusement of my other half and offspring and Bartholomew the Bat doesn't scan!

    You know you met an astronaut the other day? Well, did I never tell you how Nick Parrk lives in the next town to me and Oh, how I MET him?!!!!

  5. Ok, now I feel sick!

    I've been there but we went to the cinema and didn't get to look round the rest of the museum.. It's not far though so might go down one weekend! x

  6. Just rerad this after you directed me here. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha . . . . . . (sorry!)
    J x


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