This is what I have been this week. TOO HOT. But 'twot' is how it sounds when I'm whinging and whining about it. The HG MENTIONED IT COULD BE. MY. AGE. HOW VERY DARE HE.
Guided reading with Y2. There are six groups. The teacher took one group out. Three groups had independant (HA Ha Ha Har Har ) reading activities to be doing silently while I had another group in the classroom. The group that is rapidly becoming 'my' group. Why??? I don't want them!! Y2 children cannot do silent. And
I clearly have been working with celebrity lifestyle offspring. During the guided reading session this week my little charges and I were looking at the weighty tome "A big mess!"
We looked at the front cover to see if we could have a go at deciding what it was about.
Firstly there ensued a
massive argument heightened debate over what the red stuff was.
Child A it's chilli
Child B it's meatballs
Child A ( a bit louder ) it's chilli
Child B ( a bit louder than child A ) it's meatballs
Me to child C - what do you think it is?
Child C ( who is best friends with Child A ) I think it's chilli too
Child B - slams book on table
Me ( wondering how to apply for a job at Marks and Spencer's ) I think it's the blood spill from a guided reading group massacre.
Pause from me to remind the rest of the class that the teacher told them to work in silence and not talk.
Anyway, we turn to page one and all is revealed. Picture the scene.
Mum ( naturally ) is stood at the sink, berubber gloved, up to her eyeballs in washing up. Dad is holding a large two handed saucepan with red stuff spilling out. Floppy the dog, with red stuff over his paws, has clearly barged into Dad, causing the spillage, is running out of the kitchen after a cat. Biff, the daughter, is looking angst ridden through the doorway.
Ahaaa it is chilli delights Child A.
Child C and D together - no it isn't, it's JAM!
They are correct. There are numerous jars of jam on the side.
Child A quietly accepts this
Child B asks is it OK if I just say it's meatballs?
Me - no, because it's jam.
Child B actually huffs at me because of this and argues well I'm going to say it's meatballs. I let my inner 6 year old out and say well you are wrong it's jam. I've turned into child A!
Pause to quiet the class down again as I realise I'm actually bellowing the words 'IT IS JAM!' at a small child just because I cannot hear my own voice!
So we settle down to sounding out some words and reading the texts. We use funny voices, we point to the words. We say things like
Mmmm eh esssssssss then blend it together MESS!
Me ( wondering what I wanted to escape from Y6 for ) ok let's predict what happens next
Child A confidently shouts they are going to tidy up the mess. Child A is confident because despite being told 150 times by me, has been turning over the page for a look. Childs B, C and D all get a Teacher Award from me because they are doing the right thing and are not turning the page, then they all get an extra award for predicting a likely scenario. Child A sulks.
Let me tell you people, at this point, Child A is getting RIGHT on my tits.
Pause again to quieten the table next to us. Clearly the other two tables sensed the danger in my tone last time and were quietly on task.
Child A has also been reminded umpteen times to sit still, stay in their own space, turn around etc etc. Child A is a totally different kettle of fish to Childs ( I like using this incorrect form of the plural ok? ) B, c and D
Child B has diagnosed learning difficulties requiring a lot of 1-2-1 attention
Child C has had a terrible start in life, rescued from a dreadful home if you could call it that and is quiet and lacks confidence but has missed huge gaps in a typical upbringing meaning learning is tricky requires 1-2-1 attention
Child D is outstandingly eager to learn but is so clearly dyslexic, that reading is tricky. No diagnosis because the parents cannot fathom this out. Could do with 1-2-1 etc
Child A is just a hideously spoilt brat. Absolutely ruined by their doting parents and grandparents to the point of ridiculousness. No boundaries have ever been put in place. Child A has never been told No. Child A has no resilience because of this. They've had no broken/repair moments that normal parenting brings about to develop a lovely sweet natured, accepting child.
There's a proper word to describe this and I cannot just bring it to mind, I want to say reciprocity, but I think that's wrong.
By this I mean, in its simplest form, imagine a babe in arms, you are gazing into each other's eyes, you look away, the relationship is temporarily broken, the babe could start to panic, you look back, repairing the relationship. Babe is settled. Learns that if you go away, you will come back, all is well.
It's how you set boundaries. Children learn that if told no, they might not like it, but they will get over it and times won't be bad forever.
Barry Hymer talked about this -in our Fixed and Growth mindset train g.
Praise should be given to the effort of learning and not just to the learner. Grrrr is really bugging me what he called it, so much so, when I get to work on Monday I will post in the comments what I'm on about!!
Anyway, I think we all probably know a child A type.
If child A doesn't want to, at home, Child A doesn't have to. Child A is the centre of attention at home but is completely hateful. We do not adore Child A like child A is used to. This has caused issues from day 1 in school. The parents do not back up the teachers in front of Child A, which makes discipline pointless. How can any child accept responsibility for their actions if their parents come in and actually insist that the adults in school must be liars because their child is perfect???
When in a good mood, child A is charming. When challenged over behaviour ... An example from earlier this week
Child A - In what I would call a wheedling voice, Miss, Child D has just been saying really really mean things to me.
Me - oh really? Child D, did you just say mean things to Child A?
Child D - yes because Child A was just strangling me
Child A - clearly not wanting me to be privy to this bit of information, stands up, sticks fingers in ears, shouts, I hate teachers, blah blah I'm not listening over and over at me!
I've not even said anything at this point. I'm tending to go with Child D's version of events.
I say sternly,
Child A did you strangle Child D? Child A blows a raspberry at me, folds their arms, turns their back on me and sticks their bottom out to me!!
Me - well, I'm not surprised Child D said mean things to you, I would too if you'd strangled me! You are now on Amber because of the way you have tried to get Child D into trouble and because of your rudeness to me. Child A turns round to shout 'You're stupid' at me!
The class teacher returns and whisks Child A out of the classroom to cool down! Order is restored. The rest of the class had been enjoying fruit and milk and reading books - child A clearly had had enough of this activity!
I wish she'd whisked me out of the classroom.
He did come and apologise later on, very eloquently. Child A has an amazing vocabulary and rapport with adults, because they've only ever had adult attention and conversation. Deemed far too precious for nursery, school was a huge shock to their little over inflated ego and at the start of their third year of school, whilst being nowhere near as awful as Reception, is still the stand out kid that you notice first in a room. And there is nothing academically wrong or noticeable. Just pampered laziness. In my opinion.
Anyway I've digressed so far from my original story I'll have to go back to see where I was up to!
Ah yes, a sulking Child A is actively ignored ( something they hate! ) and Childs B,C, and D get on with the task in hand.
Mum is standing with a mop, Dad is on his hands and knees with a rag cleaning up the rug and Floppy is licking the jam.
So I'm saying to them, point to this word - mop- who can sound it out?
No one can.
Ok, I say, let's look at the pictures for clues. What is Mum using to clean up the mmmm eh sssssssss?
Child D - no hesitation - champagne.
Me ( kills self laughing inside )
Childs B and C - ohhhh my mum has one of those - (pointing to the mmmm oh ppp)
Me - what is is called? Look at the word
Childs B and C - we don't know
Child A it's a Vileda
Me - what sound does Vileda begin with? V Vileda Vuh Vuh Vuh Vileda look at the word, it's starts with a mmmm sound, mmmm
Child A goes back to sulk mode ( see above - can't take being told no, even though I didn't use the word no )
Me - so you have one of these at home for cleaning the floor, what is it called?
Nobody knows. I've lost the will to live. I'm flabbergasted.
Child F at the next table has spilt water everywhere. Child G is playing in the table puddle.Child H is upset because their picture is wet. Child I is picking it's nose.
Pause to sort the next Tabl out and sit Child F- the water spiller- at the table at the front, on their own.
I return to chaos at my own table. Child A and B are arguing again over a rubber that neither of them should be fussing over. Childs C and D are awarded a teacher award for sitting waiting patiently and for doing the right thing. The rubber is removed from Child A and both A and B are asked
Are you sitting still? No
Are you tryin g your best? No
Are you ready to learn? No
Well, on our behaviour wheels , on green it says "I am on green because I am listening well, I am trying my best and I am ready to learn.
Well then, unless you fix this RIGHT NOW, B, your peg will be moved to Amber and A you at will be moved down to red.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND. ME? Yes.
A at that moment the smiley relaxed teacher came back from her lovely calm quiet reading area with her lovely sweet well behaved independant readers.....time to tidy up!!!!
This book is 5 pages long. We did not finish it this session. It was the first session of the year. They just need re training. My feedback to the class teacher
Next week YOU have my group in here and I will take the top table out into the cosy quiet reading area!
Child C and D need to be in a separate group and Child A needs to go to another school far far away from me!
Anyway I've rambled on for far too long. My next post will be something linking in with another blog! Ooooo the mystery!
It's another glorious day. I may go out into the garden later if I can dodge the Jurassic Park sized spiders - they are so big. One had a wasp in its web, another had a giant bluebottle and the humongous one near the bins had a sparrow trapped! ( ok one of these might not be entirely true)