Sunday Morning gales, IT, cake and books.

I am laid in the dark, under my full fat winter quilt listening to the wind howl down my chimney and the rain lash my windows. I love it!

Today has a lazy feel about it. Depending on the weather we may venture out, we may not.  I am currently in a 12 round full on fistfight with my laptop. I think it's been sulking. It's true that since we got tablets, it has been neglected. But I do need it from time to time for Flash Player purposes ( come on Apple - get a move on and get Flash ) and I prefer to complete the HG's Tax thingy on my laptop.
So,the deadline is looming. 31st January is very important for Self Assessment Purposes. I am in a rush to get this done. 

 The laptop is firstly doing 1 of 32 updates and would I not power it down whilst this happens.

Three days later, I finally get to my homepage and OF COURSE my effing internet security has run out behind my back. Not to worry. I have a freebie internet security thingy for five devices I got free with my broadband. I had to uninstall the now ex out of date security. It didn't take lightly to this. Kicking and screaming, I finally evicted it. Downloaded the new. 

Completed the HMRC nonsense. 

Then set about loading CDs into iTunes. I bought 'Now That's what I call Disney' for Night Owls. Now I love a good sing a long and wanted to make sure I knew all the words before I delighted the owlets with my full on Glee esque show stopper routines!!!


Ppppppft.

OF COURSE it needed updating. *rolled eyes*

But then disaster struck. I have no idea if it's because I was clicking like a demented fool to stop things happening or if it was frankly, completely and totally knackered to start with, but it kept asking me if I had enough privileges and my Library C ++ visuals run time error failed. I also helpfully had error code 1114 flashing up at me.


Not to worry, I have plenty of weapons in my arsenal against such deadly foes. I have Mr Google and
A SIXTEEN YEAR OLD SON!! Take THAT iTunes.

He set to uninstalling, re booting, patching, re starting, system scanning etc.

To NO AVAIL. Hmm.

Last night afore bed, I had one more try. I thought I'd try a system restore back to when it WAS working. I did this.

I now have NO internet security....and it still isn't playing. I found a helpful little sequence to try when removing Apple programmes because the Mobile thingy was refusing to leave. It helpfully told me you have to remove things in a certain order. I, of course, had NOT uninstalled things in that order. Aaarrrrggghhhh.

I switched it on and off again.


I just pulled the plug and went to bed.

Today I am having. One. More. Try.

It might have to go to the Laptop Hospital. Or to Laptop heaven. Thank goodness for my iPad so I can bore the pants off you all here with my thrilling adventures!

The rest of my day will involve knitting by a roaring fire. We might venture out to a Farmer's market to look at all the overpriced artisan rustic loaves. I think I'll make a loaf myself. Not cake though. I need to stop eating cake! 

Last weekend I made the world's sickliest cake! It wasn't a pretty cake. But it's vanished so it must have been ok. ( It was bloody delicious !)
Toffee cake with caramel buttercream icing!

NOW FOR MY FIND OF THE WEEK! 

I was super excited to rescue this book from the bin at school. These stories were my all time favourite to read as a little girl. Infact, as I went to the school I now work at, it's very probable that this isn't the first time my fingers have turned the pages! Imagine my delight when the stories were televised! 

 No Sunday afternoon was complete without a trip to LHOTP on the TV. Ma was an angel and Pa was a saint. Now I like to watch it just for swooning over Michael Landon purposes. Thanks to my lovely friends Nicole, Hannah, Eryn and Nan I know the truth and that he was not good looking in real life! ( Or actually very nice!!! ) 

I am going to read these books again with grown up '28' year old eyes! I might even blog about what I think! I just need to get the other books now. They are not available on Kindle as Laura Ingalls 

Wilder has not been dead for long enough, apparently. I've been hunting in Charity shops for ages to no avail. I am going to treat myself to the others as long as I can find them cheap enough!!

The other childhood books that left a lasting impression were 

What Katy Did and What Katy did next. I devoured the Silver Sword. I never could stand The Secret Garden  or the Railway Children. I loved the Famous Five ( book 2 Five go to Kirrin Island is my favourite ) but hated the Secret Seven. I wanted to go to boarding school SO MUCH. But hoped I'd be enrolled at Mallory Towers rather than St. Clare's with those twins!! I confess to still never finishing Treasure Island. I tried to read it with the boy but still failed. I ADORED The Swiss Family Robinson but never got along with Robinson Crueso. I could go on all day here! 

What are you doing/reading today? 

The answer my friends, is blowing in the till, the answer is £4.45!

That's right. Four whole English Pounds and Forty Five shiny new pennies!

If you are new here and would like to know the question - it's in the previous post!

Not content with splurging on baked goods - that I didn't even participate in. ( Again, see previous post).  I went and blew the week's shopping budget in the Housewifery Porn Emporium that is otherwise known as Lakeland ( Plastics) . Sure , I do know in a bid to become more upmarket ,they dropped the 'Plastics'; but that's what they are known as in this house and always will be!

I came away with a HUGE bagful of goodies. I bought things like extra dividers for my 12" by 12" cake pan. I bought some bargain cake cases. I also bought some new bakeware that was on offer. A lot of mine are over 20 years old and frankly need replacing!

But this caught my eye...

I had the option of the slightly cheaper silicone version, but apart from my small cupcake cases and the larger gingerbread man one, I'm not very impressed with it. So this pretty, shiny, oh so cute tin made it into my basket!


Eagerly I set off to try it. What a DISASTER!! Well not totally.....but see for yourselves!

1. I decided to halve the recipe for the first
go as this quantity makes 24.
In hindsight - GREAT IDEA!!

 

2.  So far, all was going to plan.
I poured the mixture into a jug thinking it would be easier to control.
WRONG!  The neater ones at the top were filled by teaspoon -
JUST LIKE IT INSTRUCTED! 
Who knew??!!
It tasted YUMMEH too!

 

3. Prior to baking you add the top and clamp into place with the slidey thingies.
I took them out five minutes earlier -
and had reduced the temperature accordingly -
as I have a fan oven.
But I don't think this was supposed to happen!
Sorry for the non rotation of these pics!

 

4. Leave to cool in the tin for five minutes and then without burning your skin
off carefully prize apart the two halves.
As you can see, the disaster starts unfolding before your eyes!
 Next you have to get them out!

 

5.Leave your balls ( ahem ) to go completely cold then insert the stick.
 My balls were not happy about this.
Infact they were determined to slither off down the stick and onto the floor.
So I grimly glued them in place....
with melted white chocolate!

 

And there began the real fun. The decoration. Oh my  tiny chocolate stars what a NIGHTMARE! I used melted chocolate. I thought a quick dip in, a quick drip ,sprinkle application and job done. No. I'd used some polystyrene to stick the sticks in. If left upright all the chocolate dripped down. If put on greaseproof, all the chocolate slithered sideways. I stopped dipping and started painting. I left the chocolate to go a lot cooler. It dragged the crumbs. The recipe says 'File the middle edges for a smooth finish' I already had to glue some back together. They would not stand filing! I stood and

s     l     o     w     l      y  turned and twisted the sticks to get an even coating. I added as many sprinkles as I could. I emergency texted my close supportive friend - who just LAUGHED at my angst!

Me - What a ducking mess I'm making with these sodding cake pops.

CSF - Ha ha ha .. I can imagine. It seemed like such a good idea at the time!

Me - The sticks don't hold the weight. There's melted chocolate everywhere. I've sprinkles stuck to my eyebrows. So I've 'glued' the sticks in with chocolate and I've WALKED AWAY!! %^&*&^%% Balls!


CSF- I am crying here LOLOLOLOLO you do make me giggle. You should tweet all that. It's hysterical! Balls to Cake Pops I say!

So I declined her kind suggestion, choosing to blog it instead! Cheers CSF - you know who you are!

Please don't laugh when you see my deformed balls. They taste absolutely DIVINE! That's all that matters. Right?!

 

I hope you scrolled back up to note the similarities between mine and the illustrated recipe card!

Lessons I have learned.

1. Cake pops are ROCK HARD to decorate.

2. Grease the tin A LOT MORE

3. Bake for slightly LESS time than I did at a slightly lower temperature.

4. Hire a professional to come an decorate  them.

 

Have you ever made these? Have you any *coughs* 'success' stories you'd like to share?

Easter in the Kitchen. Many Photos!

Hey folks!

How are you all? Having a lovely long weekend I hope. I ADORE long weekends. Especially those where I don't have to go to work straight after them! Now you know I love my job. I doooo. But I love the holidays more!

So Friday we went out for the day. Saturday too. It was nice on Sunday to have a day of pottering. The HG took the offspring off out into the weak Spring Sunshine and they blitzed the garden. I can now go peg out without having to run a Krypton Factoresque gauntlet, with washing over one shoulder and a handful of pegs in the other! Anyway

I spent most of my day in my kitchen. I baked and made stuff. I'm going to tell you and show you here!
Firstly. Crumpets. I have no idea why I wanted to make them. Having now made them, I'm not sure if I 'll want to for a long time. Maybe if ALL I'm making is crumpets I'll consider it.

This recipe is from my trusty Mary Berry Cookery bible that I've had for YEARS. I just made one quantity.

So here are the photos a step at a time!

12 oz  of strong bread flour?
Don't mind if I do!

Put in bowl. Check. Cover. Check. Wait!

OOOH! It's all got big and frothy!

I had washed my hands!

Here goes!

Oh dear I think I added too much batter to the ring.

Wait - somethings happening!

It's beginning to look a lot like a crumpet!

Ta DAAAH! First one done.



Getting cocky now - two at a time!

It took a few attempts to work out times/heats/amounts to pour in. I made a slightly thinner lot and some hefty cousins!

The boy had one with butter and one with butter and jam

Six had gone already - had to quickly take a photo before the rest went!

One of these is mine, one of them is a shop bought Warburtons. Neither have been toasted yet. Which one would you choose?

 So the downfall I discovered is that they take a good 7 - 10 minutes each in the rings to cook. Which is fine if you've not been on your feet all day making other stuff. Also I am a brat when it comes to making pancakes. I HATE being told what to do by eggs, flour and milk! You have to be patient with them yet speedy! I am sure the last one I made did not rise or was as holey as the first one I made. Tasted fine! So I reckon I made a batch of 20 crumpets for about 50p all in. Not bad.

BUT I also made some Easter Nest cakes. Chocolate - melted. Shredded Wheat - crumbled. Mixture - stirred. Mini Eggs - adorned.
Beef in Ale for pie - Cubes of beef skirt - coated in seasoned flour and flash fried. A red onion, three banana shallots and two carrots - sauteed. Put the lot in a casserole with half a bottle of Ale and some good stock plus a tspn of Marmite. Cook for aaaaages.  The puff pastry took me ages. Those packets are really tricky to get open!
Sand Cake - absolutely NO calories in this whatsoever - from my new book that I got from the bookman at school - billy bargain five quid! Me and Beryl worked hard to combine all the  diet ingredients together! I used a diet frosting recipe, Double cream, white chocolate, butter and icing sugar topped off with a diet jelly thingy from the doctors. Dr Oetkers.
I also worried I'd not spent enough time in the kitchen so soft floury baps were born.

Less than 24 hours later and a lot of it has gone. I could weep! Not to mind! I might make some fairy cakes later. We make fairy cakes in this house - not cupcakes!

I'll post some more pics here just to make your computer lag a bit more.I am making them small as possible.  I'm not in the least bit sorry! I am also off to read some other blogs too. Now that I have the freedom and the time! I'll be back tomorrow with a story all about The Lord Of The Rings.
 Photos .....

 



Healthy wholewheat goodness!

Zero Calories here - look away - nothing to see!

Rolled out by my own fair hands! Again thoroughly washed clean hands.

Best beef in ale I have ever made!

Last but not least. HOW THE BLOODY HELL DO I GET PAST LEVEL 65???????
THREE WEEKS I'VE BEEN AT IT!!!

Do you want to see my cakes #2?

Again, not a euphemism.

Just a few minutes to post a few more photos of cakes what I made in the past!

When my daughter was tiny, as I said on Wednesday,  I didn't work, but I did take advantage of some of the free adult learning activities at the local night school. That's how long ago it was. It was called Night school.

Anyway I took up Sugarcraft. I LOVED it. I was the youngest by a good forty years but I used to love my Thursday nights with the ladies. The tutor was an amazingly talented lady called Anne. She had the lightest, fastest fingers in the west!.

One time, at Sugarcraft class ( sic ) ...We made piping bags out of greaseproof paper. A rectangular piece of greaseproof paper. We folded the corner down and some how got the bag template. I picked up the hang of that really quickly. Fashioning a cone shaped piping bag? She made would make a Japanese Origami Ninja Master look like ( um um searches brain for something super clumsy here ) er that he'd never folded a piece of paper in his life . ( Sorry - it's lame but it's early )

That woman must have been a saint. I could not do it. Dyslexia means you struggle with words, Dyscalculia means you struggle with numbers - I had Dyspipingbagia -- I struggled. Ok .

 Without complaining once, for one and a half hours that woman showed me how to wrap the bag round my hand, tucking one end under my thumb, make a point so sharp it hurt ( that was the test - if it didn't hurt when you pricked yourself with it, it wasn't good enough)  and then withdraw your hand so it didn't collapse and fold down the sides. Easy peasy.

Finally, I did it! My eureka moment. The old ladies clapped, I think the teacher cried. I could now PIPE! with my own BAG!

It is actually very easy - once you know how!!

I went for nigh on three years until my second baby arrived. Then the free night schooling stopped and I couldn't afford to carry on. But I'd built up one of those massive B&Q tool boxes full of PME tools ( The very best ) flower cutters, colour paste, stamens etc. I still have it and it still gets used. But not enough. But I have no where near enough spare time. ( Ok I get about 43 weeks off  a year with school holidays etc! ) but I think I am going to have a dabble again soon.

The one downside of my sugar craft career is that one day making sugar fondant was I burnt out the motor on my beloved Kenwood mixer. I couldn't afford to have it repaired or replaced....so if anyone looking in wants to buy me one, or review one ( never reviewed anything in my life before - but apparently some bloggers do this?! ) I would LOVE a new Kenwood. Le sigh. Anyway enough waffle - some more of my handy work.

One of my favourite cakes I made was Noddy and Big Ears in Noddy's car for my Daughter's fifth birthday I think it was - but I have no photograph of it :(.

I have real troubles when adding photos - esp when I add captions, they seem to jump out of order which is what has happened here. Sorry !

I made my Son's Christening Cake. Daisies, Rose buds and Ivy. Very Masculine!

Attention to detail round the back, although please note, the van doors did not open!

This cake weighed an effin ton!
That's not a smile on my face,
it's a weightlifter's grimace.

I made my first posy of roses for my Aunties 60th Birthday. They are not perfect but not bad for a first go.

The whole cake. The icing I did with a number 2 first in white then a 1 in pink. A bit of a wobbly hand - but this was my first formal cake!

A certain little Tank engine for my little lad's three year old birthday.

I think he was chuffed to bits with it!

No wonder the post was late that day - he was posing in my kitchen!

That was her 'excited I love my cake so much mummy' face! 

Round the back! Real ( sugarpaste) coal to burn!

The colour of the photo does not do this cake justice. It was lovely in blues. This I think was my peice de resistance. The old woman who lived in a shoe. I was up til 4am of my daughter's birthday tiling that effing roof!

I made this for my darling Nanna. The starnge marks are on the photo from the plastic film. It's not my icing.

I gave people these little baskets of flowers for Easter in the first year. These flowers are still ok today! Bits have broken off - but they are almost 18 years old!

My little pony cottage for the girl child's 6th. The pony's are plastic! The cottage is modelled on our house. ( Ok that last bit was a lie) But ( adopts Lloyd Grossman's voice ) Who lives in a house like this?!

I hope you have enjoyed looking at these ckes :).
Like I mentioned earlier - if you want to give me a brand spanking new kenwood - then I urge you to do get in touch! Cheers!!