Well, just a short post as I am supposed to be getting my overnight bag ready. Harry has been called back to The BRILLIANT Birmingham Children's Hospital sooner than Lisa thought. We are hoping that it does not mean anything sinister.
To look at him on this photo - which is how he is all the time, Smiley and gorgeous. So sweet natured, happy, a little innocent angel - you would not think that lurking, slinking, behind those big, beautiful baby blues is an evil, twisted, hideous disease called Bilateral Retinoblastoma slowly trying to take his sight, eyes and if it had it's way, his life. The tumour on his left eye is dangerously close to his optic nerve.
Ooh hang on, can't type as tears in the way.
Right, have pulled myself together. I just love this little treasure Harrychops so much and cannot bear the thought of him having to deal with this. Over and over.
But it's how it is. Lisa remains strong on the outside but I know she is glad I can come with her this time. It's a long three hours on that M6, taking your little one to somewhere, who, now he is older, is beginning to realise where he is and no he doesn't like it, on your own. We try and find humour in any situation. It helps. Certainly when we get there, see all the other little heartbreakers, ( And bloody hell it is ONE emotional place and so humbling ) we thank our lucky stars that Harry IS being treated. The staff are great. Expertly, they guide these shellshocked parents gently through what has to happen. It is amazing how resilient children are. They are just happy playing. To babies like Harry, cancer is normal.
Three weeks ago she was on her own as they delivered the devastating news that after two clear exams, this time the tumours had re grown in his right eye. This is his 'good' eye. The one which he has limited sight in. They look for these seedlings as they call them and laser blast them into oblivion. Only trouble is, these blasts are bitter sweet. Sweet because they destroy the filthy cancer, bitter because they also leave scarring which means another tiny bit of sight is permanently gone. I am glad they are on the ball, I am wondering if they think Harry, who will be going through a big growth spurt again, will be susceptible to rapid tumour growth. Let's hope I am wrong.
So let's all cross our fingers, salute any single magpies, send up prayers, healing thoughts Harry's way. he does need every bit of positive energy he can get. Use our adopted motto.
DUM SPIRO SPERO
While I breathe, I hope.
Welcome to any new readers, if you'd like to find out more about my nephew Harry, I have a few posts on him since April 2011 when he was diagnosed at just 13 weeks old, Or you can pop by Lisa's ( my sister ) blog and have a read there. She appreciates any support.
Love Rachel xx