I hereby resign from the guild of the housewives and realise I no longer have any claim to the throne of the domestic goddess.
IN MY DEFENCE, your honour, we do have one of those giant American fridges which is plumbed in so never gets pulled out. The floor underneath does get swept from time to time. Clearly the last time to time was pre 2011!!!
So how come there was an episode of Ch4’s Time Team going on in my kitchen? The HG was reaching for something from the redesigned corner of the back kitchen, as he reached, a box of bits for the new radiator fell off and went down the side of the cupboard and fridge where there’s just the right amount of room to slide and hide my clothes airer. With much swearing, the airer was moved and the bits of radiator gubbins collected. Except one valve. Looked again, couldn’t see it.
It could only have gone under the fridge, or worse, round the corner at the back of the cupboardin the corner. This would have meant having to pull the cupboard out. ( or just going on screwfux and buying a new one - my thoughts!!! )
So armed with my broom handle, I lay down I the floor, stuck the broom handle under the fridge and started pulling forwards. I felt something. Surely the valve. It resisted. So I got to my knees to manoeuvre the broom handle towards me. It was soft and I looked in horror as a black dead body came forth covered in dust and an old receipt. I admit I screamed, recoiled in horror and possible did a little wee.
It was a sock! THAT IS WHERE ODD SOCKS GO TO DIE PEOPLE!! Thus solving that mystery of why you only get odd socks back out of the washer when you know full well you put complete pairs in there??
One more sweep revealed the tomato purée. The HG came to take over as his arms are longer than mine and he could get right to the back corner.
Hurrah! Valve found and floor under fridge slightly cleaner than it was before!!
Valve now on new radiator which is WHEREIT SHOULD HAVE BEEN IN THE FIRST PLACE IF ONE OF US WOULD EVER FINISH A JOB. But of course, I didn’t say a word! I may have pursed my lips a bit, but not one word!
Will now make the effort with those floor wipey things wrapped round broom handle to sweep under there!! What’s that? Photo or it never happened? Ok then!!
|The dead creature from beyond the fridge.|
|So out of date!|
Right, Monday morning. Let’s see what today brings. Cannot believe we are halfway through January already!
Lots of love from
Rachel *ex domestic goddess* Radiostar xxx